Ben Marchman
Forum Replies Created
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Howdy everyone!
Sorry I’m late into the introduction. I live in Sharpsburg GA. Partswork was the most fun and interesting part of NCC Cert. for me. Hoping to learn more! 🙂
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Thats amazing MJ! Sounds like the space that you help for your friend was a powerful space for her to be in. But also your essence was all that she needed. Really cool!
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I have been working with someone who has been in the process of grieving her old patterns. She used to be angry and a bitch (her words not mine) towards her family specifically her sister. I started off by asking her about the intention for the session, and reemphasized that it was a safe container where there is no judgment and she is free to be honest and true. After getting some initial story she told me she wanted to have a better relationship with her sister, but these old patterns would still be coming in to stop her from doing that.
We found out that what she ended up needing was to address the old parts of her that was still holding on trying to stop this new way of being from coming up. She wanted to sit with how she was feeling, so she did a little 10-minute meditation. Afterwards she decided to have a little conversation with this part of her to figure out what this part really needed. In the end, after some connecting with the older patterns, she decided she wanted to let this part essentially die. She wanted to grief properly because it was time for this old way of being to leave. She acknowledged of what she was feeling, and then out loud said that it was okay to let go. That letting go was not a weakness. This change that was taking place had no room for two contradictory behaviors.
After she was able to grieve, she told me that she wanted to reach out to her sister and express this new person she was becoming. We had a follow up a couple days later and she told me she was able to have a meaningful conversation with her sister because she was living from this new state that was born after the old state had left.Great post Cory!
Neat to see a client who is aware of their own feelings but still searching deeper to rediscover patterns. Also congrats on being patient and holding what looks like a very open and safe place for her to move forward to embody her grief in a different way.
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INITIAL POST:
I had some chances to meet up with the previous client what I had from last module. It was actually really challenging at first to touch base again after taking a month off together. She had made so much progress after we worked together for more than three weeks. But unfortunately she went back into some therapy sessions after a recent death of a close friend. And the theraoy sessions brought up some past trauma memories that resurfaced during our coaching session.What came up in our first session was interesting. We ended up doing a two hour session focusing mostly on just what her deeper need was not really making any moves forward. She just truly wanted to be in a state of being of groundedness and wanted to feel that with another person/a coach. Around the 1:30 mark an even deeper need came up which was creating a community of support behind her so that she could move forward after she realized that she was been so alone in her work and growth. Then the light bulbs turned on in my head and allowed me to pull in a lil more guidance in + gestalt.
I asked her, “What would it feel like to have that community of support in human form as you move forward with your vision?” this took up the entire last half hour of at least 30minute story, yet a much needed story, of what she would like to see in this group of people. S
So at the end of our session we tried something a lil-more out of the box, which was to create a SOUL Circle. A Circle of Trust/A circle of people that the can turn to and check in with on a bi-monthly basis. The group of course are people that listen without judgement, don’t give advice, the just hold space and listen. She was the first client I was able to fully do this with and it’s been pretty amazing to here the updates from the members in her SOUL Circle as well as her being anchored in this coaching time that we now have together.
It has been a month sine we have talked but she is still checking in via emails and short phone calls with me helping her be accountable to her feeling grounded and building community behind herself.
She said last phone call check in ~ “I don’t know what I would do without my five SOUL Circle members. We only meet once a month but I live for those moments for people to just sit and listen to me. All I want is for my words and emotions in heard and felt by others. It gives me hope!”
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Wow Nadine. Love your post. Very detailed!
I like your mention of the intro and how you shared the Grand Canyon story to bring her into the moment at the beginning of the session. Then your phone exercise section 🙂 Very creative!What I was curious about was how you felt when that exercise felt as your said – “Dead.” By reading what you stated it must of felt pushed onto the client? Just was curious on how that lead to your deeper need.
Amazing job and sounds like a great session! -
Sheri I liked how honest you were in your post. And can totally relate to now feeling the client right away and then connecting overtime. Thanks for sharing!
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INITIAL POST:
Way beyond due but here ya go….
There is a ton here that I learned with my client and how I worked with Brain and Trauma. I was lucky in that I had a client that had been through therapy for almost a decade but was now moving past her past trauma and wanting to really make an impact with her work in the community.
The coaching agreement ~ we had established that we were going to be working in long term coaching (8 sessions) due to the fact that she was wanting to integrate big plans for her business but also be more directed to her Soul-Purpose. The sessions ended up building on each other over a weekly basis.What I enjoyed and learned a ton from was how Partswork can be integrated in when your working deeply with Soulwork andhlep work towards long term change. It’s like from Roger Strachans writing in “Self, Soul Sprit”….Soul is the gestalt of our being and therefore greater than the sum of its parts. Soul is the essence of our totality, the essence of our being”. Knowing that the Soul is unique is just the first step and then we worked with her parts overtime to piece out exactly what her long term vision was and what state of being she wanted to hold while we worked together.
Partswork while working with understanding Brand & Change is not only profound for me but so exhilarating. I am excited because I still get to check in with this client and see her progress on a weekly basis and it’s really inspiring.
Another piece that I found interesting was trying to be more aware of the brain science going on while we were in our coaching sessions. I found myself trying to track where she was internally…most of the time getting lost..haha. But when I did make connections it was cool to find out that I could almost follow her growth in insight as well as emotions when her brain was working from the hippocampus. It was like it in perceptual memory, then moving into factual memory, and then had the ability to move into more of creating a story behind her work, then moving into integration. So RAD!
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Initial Post:
Lately I have been focusing more on long term clients and not really one-off type clients. This of course has slowed business down but the clients that I do have are greatly helping me improve my practice.
I have one client who is currently seeing a therapist for grief and trauma. So this collaboration with a therapist and taking them after they are out of therapy has been very helpful. At first I had a hard time making sure I wasn’t overstepping any boundaries. I still feel hesitant that it isn’t my profession and title to handle these type of clients since we aren’t licensed and ethically trained.
Yet…this client (She) was actually perfect and we are now 3 weeks in with a 4th session next week. What helped this time was slowly building the trust of meeting inside in an office space and then bringing them outdoors! One thing I am excited about with this clients is that the nature collaboration piece has been extremely beneficial. I have been taking some EcoTherapy Certification courses for my Level 2 Certification and am sort of becoming more aware of deeper consciousness practices to use with them.
Last session we did a two hour session on my farm. This was a special session because it sort of extended from the last one so we were in threshold the entire time using Gestalt. What was profound about it is that a ritual idea formulated out of the sessions and she thought of her own ritual to do out onto the land and to embody it. It was very moving for the both of us and I can’t wait for the next session because she wants to have a session a day before a NatureLink Vision Quest that she signed up for!
These long term clients are slowly starting to become more aware of our other programs and it so humbling to see them come back to Vision Quest and other community programs I am offering. 🙂
What steps did you take to establish the Coaching Relationship and focus the session?
How did or could the concepts learned this last weekend fit into your nature-connected coaching session?
How did or could you collaborate with Nature and combine the concepts learned this last weekend with Coaching principles?
What challenges did you face? How did you adapt?
What flowed and how did you build off it?
What did you learn about yourself and nature-connected coaching?
How do the readings relate and interact with the face to face material and your work with your practice clients?
What ideas do you have for how you might use the concepts learned this last weekend and nature-connected coaching in the future with your client?
How do change theory and neuroscience principals effect or enhance your Coaching Presence and approach?
How does Nature-Connected Practices, change theory, and neuroscience principals interface? -
Lisa,
I liked your inner conscious approach to bringing back to self and in the moment. You seem to have a special gift with this. This is not an easy task but working with you in the past I experienced this as well. You have an amazing presence and soothing understanding voice that I’m sure this same client experienced.
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Ben,
This is such a cool experience since it was your first NCC session in nature…AND it started on the bed of the truck. Ha awesome!
And those mantras seemed to be really helpful for her. I’m excited to see what she experiences with you next time.
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Amanda,
Great stuff here!
It’s amazing how you tapped into seeing how Partswork allowed you to fundamentally understand why you could understand many polarizing feelings all at once. Love, fear, serendipity, unworthiness.
What moved me the most about your post is this – “I used trees to represent the different parts of myself and consciously making my parts tangible beings became so powerful I couldn’t believe what was being said. Fully embodying my body and mind as one of the parts, I was able to understand why they are there, how they serve me and what their wants and needs are. Unbelievably transformative!”
––– This is soooo rad! What a phenomenal realization and deep understanding! -
Taylor this is great!
I think the embody part is also challenging since the conversation is mostly in the head. Most of the time I don’t think the client is fully inside with the parts as well.
It’s cool how you are getting to go more with the flow and being more creative with your sessions. Keep on chugging over there!
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Yea Taylor thinking back on it now….
She was having relationship conflicts so we used standing objects such as trees that were grounded relationship figures. There were two moving parts in your relationship that needed to communicate so we picked out two bushes that had seen some heat related stress from the weather…so these bushes were the parts in conflict.
At the end of the session she was pretty much sitting in between both bushes and we were doing the typical partswork interview process.
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Sandy,
Enjoyed your post about Gestalt!
It was cool to see how you have adjusted to use Gestalt even though you were already aware of it from your past work. What is so neat is how to are starting to notice where clients are at with their introjections etc and making yourself curious again and drawn to the moment.
I curious on how these questions are drawing you more into the conscious conversation mode. Whenever I have a conversation with you I can definitely become aware of these myself. You do such a great job with that!
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Wow Melissa! That is brave of you to work with your Wife and cut off the role piece. That is really inspiring especially that you did the session in the car!
Pretty cool that Partswork and Gestalt could be used together to help the client build more awareness behind specific parts that arose in the conversation. And that you even had a weekly plan to help address the issue.
Cars are so stressful to me and it seemed you were able to breakthrough and help ease the situation!